Love and Madness
by Zoe Montrose
Summary: After loosing his job Ludwig is pretty much in a fix and suddenly lands in a baker's shop whose baker will change his life.
1. Chapter 1

**So this is my first fanfic so don't be too mean xD It plays in the human world with everybody being humans. **

He rested his head on the table of his working place, taking a deep breath to calm down a little from the stress he currently had. His boss wanted him to finish his paperwork until in two hours but it was just too much. Every time he felt like it was over a new stack of paper found its way on his table. With a loud sigh he sat back up, looking out of the window.

Suddenly his phone rang. "Ja, Ludwig Beilschmidt here?" A loud and annoying voice answered him. "Jo, Lutz! Where are you?" He rolled his eyes. "At work, where else am I supposed to be at this time?" "Jaja, just wanting to know."

And with that the call was over. He stared at his phone in confusion for a moment before shrugging his shoulders and putting the phone into his pocket again. For the next two hours he worked on the papers until finally the last one was done and he could lean back with his hands crossed behind his head, a small satisfied smile on his lips.

Just when he was about to tell his boss that he was done, a white haired male came running through the office, laughing and calling his name. Immediately he got pale.

The last time his brother had come to his working place he had gotten into deep trouble with his boss because Gilbert had caused chaos. He was grabbed by his arm and pulled forward by his brother. "Come on, Lutz! Let's get you outta this shitty place", he yelled disturbing all of the other workers that looked up from their tables. "Quiet, Gilbert!", he hissed at him but it was too late. While turning around, the Prussian accidentally pushed a stack of documents down from a table, causing them to fly around in the room. Gilbert whose attention got caught by the movements behind him turned back around, sending a cup of coffee that a man who walked past him was carrying, flying through the room as well, landing on the papers on the ground. Ludwig closed his eyes, not wanting to see the rest of the chaos. "Beilschmidt! Into my office! NOW!" He pressed his eyes tightly shut. "Go home brother. We talk later." Sensing that he had done something that annoyed his younger brother again, Gilbert grinned and shrugged his shoulders, leaving the office again.

Ludwig turned around and slowly walked into his boss' office, closing the door behind him. The tall man sat in his chair behind his table, staring coldly at him. "Have I not told you, Mr. Beilschmidt, that your brother is not welcomed here?" He could tell his boss that he did not know that Gilbert was coming. He could tell him that it was not his fault, but he knew that his boss would not listen. So he just nodded. "Then I don't understand why he was here and caused a chaos again."

He chose to just stare at his hands, fiddling with his fingers. "I'm sorry, Sir." For a while there was silence between them in which he could feel his boss' eyes on him, studying him. "Pack your things, Mr. Beilschmidt. I don't need workers that are not able to do as they are told!" His head shot up and he stared wide eyed at the man. "What? No, please!" He just shook his head, pointing towards the door. "You know the way out. Please leave, I don't want to have to call the security service."

Numb. He felt numb while leaving his boss' office, gathering his few belongings on his table and stuffing them into his bag, for one time in his life not caring about order. With shaky hands he opened the glass door to his unit, later not even remembering getting down the stairs and opening his car, nor throwing his bag onto the passenger seat or starting the car.

After some time he reached his apartment, opening the door and being greeted by his three dogs that jumped up his legs, barking happily. When they sensed that their Master was sad, they stayed behind him.

Silently he filled three bowls with dog food, placing them on the floor before breaking down on the couch. He couldn't believe it, he had gotten fired. 'What am I supposed to do now?'

He stayed on the couch for a while, drinking beer and getting more and more depressed with each one. After some time the drink was out and he stood up, swaying a little before getting his coat and simply throwing it over his shoulder, stumbling down the stairs to the door and out on the street, finding himself a bar to keep drinking in.

His head hit the hard table of the bar while he sang some stupid song in the wrong way, his head spinning. Somebody grabbed his arm and pulled him up, his body fell against him. "That was enough alcohol for you, my friend. Go home and sleep!" He grumbled, having troubles to stand on his own legs while he was pushed out of the bar and onto the street. The cold air hit his body, he had lost his coat after the third bar, but in his drunken state he didn't care.

He stumbled down the streets, still singing and laughing to himself, but the alcohol demanded its price, making his eyelids heavy and his tongue dry. He fell down, leaning his head against the wall behind him and just letting his mind getting dizzier and dizzier until he fell asleep.


	2. Chapter 2

**Oh and what I forgot last time, please review and tell me what I can do better.**

He woke up by somebody poking his cheek, causing him to turn his head away from the annoyance, a soft yawn falling from his lips. 'Get up! You have to go to work!' His head shot up, his body wanting to follow but the slight dizziness and the headache from the alcohol from the last night caused him to sway and fall, landing on the person that had poked him.

"H-hey, watch out!" He forced his hurting eyes open, the bright sunlight making him groan out in pain. "Was a long night, what?" First now did he recognize that he was on top of whoever had awoken him. He looked down on a male with ocean blue eyes, spiky blond hair and a beaming grin with cute dimples on his cheeks. '...Cute?'

He shook his head and blushed bright red, trying to get up but the rest alcohol in his blood made it hard for him. The man under him wiggled free, stood up and offered him a hand to help him stand. "Uh.. you smell like a whole bar!" The man shook his head, opened a door behind him and guided him into a good smelling room.

He looked around, seeing that he seemed to be in a baker's shop, the male placing him on a chair in a corner. "Here, stay here. I'll get you a glass of water and some painkillers." He still had that beaming smile, winking at him as if they had just shared a secret. "Who are you?" He didn't sound polite in any way, he was tired, had a booming headache and felt sick, but the man's smile stayed. "My name is Matthias. Matthias Køhler."

He watched how Matthias vanished into a backroom of the store, most likely the bakery behind the shop. The moment he was gone he leaned his head against the wall behind him and groaned in a mixture of pain and agony. 'Great I have lost my job but now at least I have a headache the size of Russia. Great, just great!' He looked around in the bright room, a glass counter showed different kinds of bread or small sweets like doughnuts. To his surprise he couldn't find any kind of cake or other sweets like cupcakes in the store, but his troubled and dizzy mind dismissed it and decided that there were way more important things than the missing of sweets in a baker's shop.

Matthias returned to him with a glass and some pills, sitting down opposite to him. "So may I ask why I found you sitting in the door to my shop? Oh, wait, no. Sleeping in the door of my shop?" He raised his eyebrows, his smile still on his lips.

He sighed, swallowing the pills with the water and resting his aching head in his hands. 'Why not tell him? He's a stranger so the possibility of him telling somebody I know is zero.' Ludwig looked the man up and down, then closed his eyes. "I got fired, okay? Just so! No real reason... just my stupid brother!" He leaned back in the chair, rolling his numb shoulders. "How late is it anyways?" "Around 9 o'clock. It's Saturday, there I only open my shop here from 9 to 2 o'clock." Matthias shrugged his shoulders, the grin never fading from his face.

He nodded, slow and careful, his head still aching. "I see.. Thank you for the... useful information." For the next minutes, an awkward silence spread between them in which Matthias drummed a rhythm on the table while watching Ludwig who sat with his face in his hands. "Eh.. y-you smell.. Do you maybe want to take a shower? Or eat something? I have an apartment right above the shop. So if you want to.."

He shook his head. "Thanks but I have to go home. My dogs need to be fed and I need to search.. for a new job!" He smiled at the male, surprising himself. He usually didn't smile that much but this man's smile was just too contagious. "Okay fine, but I will still invite you for a breakfast. How do you like your bread? Because I have pretty much of that." He chuckled and stood up, humming a tune while getting one of the large breads out of the counter, cutting it into slices. "Jam? Honey? Butter? Sliced, cold sausage? Cheese?"

Ludwig blinked a couple of times. "Eh.. butter, please?" He looked around again in the baker's shop, trying to sort his thoughts a little. He flinched a little when the plate with his breakfast was placed in front of him, Matthias sitting down on the chair opposite to him. "So you got fired. Why?" He placed his chin in his hand, eating silently and watching his guest.

"Well.. my brother decided to pay me a visit at work and my boss' wasn't so very happy about that because.. Wherever my brother walks, he caused chaos."

Matthias raised his eyebrows and continued to eat. "But why did you get fired?" "My boss was the opinion that I was just not able to do as I was told and he didn't like that." He shrugged his shoulders. "Hmm.. Sounds like an idiot to me." They ate in silence from there on, Ludwig thinking about his job and what he could do now while Matthias was watching him, going after his own thoughts.

He stood up and brushed the small crumbles from his lap, noticing that his headache was almost done. "Thank you very much. For the food and the painkillers." He nodded at the man and turned to leave when a hand grabbed his sleeve. "Before you go.. I have a question. What is your name?" Ludwig blushed a little. "How embarrassing. My name is Ludwig Beilschmidt." A new happy smile spread on Matthias lips. "Ludwig. Nice. Hey Ludwig, when you want to talk or have a nice bread, just come here, will you?"

He tilted his head a little to the side, then grinned and nodded. "Sure, Matthias. I'll come. And next time I will pay, I promise." The man laughed and waved him goodbye while he walked out of the door, suddenly feeling as if today maybe could even be good for something.


	3. Chapter 3

**So here is chapter 3 for the crazy ones that actually read this…:3 oh and I know that what I will write in this chap will be a little unrealistic buuuuut…. I don't care~ xD Aaaand Warning: Gil's mouth and some family arguments~**

He puffed his cheeks, glaring at the telephone in front of him. Three times had he now tried to call this stupid company, but nobody would answer his calls. It had been a week since his boss had thrown him out of his working place, a week since he had breakfasted in a baker's shop together with a stranger. A week since he had last seen his brother. And it all made him furious.

A soft furry head placed itself in his lap, a rough and wet tongue licked his hand, trying to calm him down. "I know girl, anger won't help… but it feels good, being angry!" Aster looked up to him with big black eyes, a soft whine coming from her. "You hungry? Come, let's get something to eat for you!" He stood up, leaving his home office in a state of chaos: Papers with underlined job offers, a plate with toasts, and a glass beer against his nerves, a blanket and some pillows on the couch and cloths on the chairs. In the last days he had been way too nervous and too stressed to keep his usual order, so he let chaos take over. With a sigh he closed the door, promising the screaming and short-before-fainting-side in him to clean the room later.

Down in the kitchen he prepared three bowls with dog food, placing them on the floor where they were cleaned by his three dogs in milliseconds. He leaned against the counter with a grin, shaking his head a little. "One day you will get so fat from stuffing yourself like that that I can roll you through the parks!" Aster, Berlitz and Blackie looked up, an almost insulted expression on their faces. "Okay, sorry, you three would never get fat.."

The doorbell tore him out of his thoughts. The moment he opened it he wanted to slam it back shut into the face of the others person, but his brother had his feet in the door and as much as he wanted to break it, he knew that he couldn't pay the hospital bill now. "What", he spit into his face, wanting to whip the grin out of his brother's face. The albino never stopped grinning while entering the house. "What 'what'? I live here, am I not allowed to come home from time to time?" With his hands in his pockets he walked into the kitchen, petting the dog's heads. "Wow there's been that fucking amazing concert yesterday, Francis, Antonio and I went there and it was... WOW!"

He rolled his eyes, still more that pissed because of his brother. "Whatever. I'm not here to tell you about things you'll never experience but because I need money. Can you lend me something?"

He stared at the albino as if he had just told him he came fresh from the moon. 'How dare he...?' His cheeks got red with anger and slowly he walked towards his brother. "Do you have any idea what you did to me, you blasted idiot? A little, tiny idea?" Gilbert raised his eyebrows. "Because of you I got fired and now you dare coming in here as if nothing happened?"  
"It's not my fault that your boss is a pest!" Now he was short before bursting. "Was. He was a pest. I am fired, Gil! I don't have the money you want thanks to you! Thanks to you I have to search for a new job. Thanks to you I most likely won't be able to pay the bills for this huge house anymore! Thanks to you.. Oh forget about it. Just go. Leave. Now!" He had gotten louder with each word, but now his voice was silent and cold. Ice cold.

Gilbert just laughed and leaned against the counter, crossing his arms as well. "And what if not? What if I just stay right here and don't move?" He was too angry and too tired to have this kind or argument with his brother now so he just grabbed him by his upper arm and dragged him behind him to the door. "If you want to live here, pay the bills with me! Otherwise go to your friends and live there! Oh wait, that's exactly what you are doing anyways! You always are with your friends."

"Oh come on, just because you don't have any friends!" "Well one of us needs to work! Otherwise the fridge that you always plunder would be empty and we would be living in an apartment instead of this huge house that is so unnecessary!"

Silence spread between them in which they coldly stared at each other. In the end, Gilbert rolled his eyes and groaned. "Fine! Then I will stay with my friends if you have to bitch like a thirteen year old teenage girl!" With these words he turned around and slammed the door shut behind him.

Ludwig took a shaky breath while running a hand through his hair. "Shit.. shit, shit, shit, shit, shit!" He sat down on a chair in the hallway. Yes, he was angry about his brother but actually had he hoped to get help from him to pay the bills, because just this morning he had gotten a letter that the rent was due and that if he didn't pay this week, the house had to be taken away from them. He cursed once more, standing up, turning around and marching up the stairs into the office, gathering his phone and his wallet before returning downstairs. "Come here, babies. We go for a walk." He needed to get out of here, needed to get out and walk so he'd stop thinking about this.

The park was empty at this time and this weather, fine rain falling down from the sky. The dogs ran barking through the park, not caring about anything. His brother's words haunted him. 'Just because you don't have any friends'. It was kind of true. He really didn't have anybody to speak with if he needed to. And at the moment he really needed somebody to speak with. He had had some workmates with whom he could go out for a drink if he wanted to but somebody to pour his heart out to? No, not really.

'Well... actually that's not true. You have that baker to talk with. He offered it to you.' He looked up from the ground, suddenly having a destination.


	4. Chapter 4

**So I don't even know why I continue writing this but I guess I just don't have any hobbies ^-^ Please review so I know if anybody even likes this xD  
**

The walk to the baker's shop took a while, mostly because he needed to remember where it was since the last time he had been there, the alcohol had clouded his mind a little. When he finally found it, the sky was a deep grey and it was cold. The light that shone from the shop's windows was warm and inviting and he didn't hesitate for a second before stepping inside.

Warm air and a sweet smell greeted him, as well as the sound of people talking and the bell above the door ringing, announcing his arrival. Matthias was currently busy talking to a customer, his usual cheerful smile on his lips. He cleaned his flour covered hands on his red apron when he lifted his head and met Ludwig's eyes. Immediately his smile got wider.

"You sober this time? Or shall I bring you some painkillers?" Ludwig watched how Matthias came to him from behind the counter, his three dogs sitting next to him with their tails wagging and their eyes searching the room for something eatable. When the baker saw them he crouched down and cooed, reaching his hands out to them and scratching them behind their ears. "What little beauties did you bring this time? Hallo, you little cuties."

Ludwig chuckled while watching them, alone the behavior of the other man cheering him up a little. Matthias stood back up, cleaning his hands once more. "Are you here to buy something? Or do you need something else?" "Actually I am here because… eh… Ja, I want to buy bread!" Suddenly he was way too shy to tell Matthias why he was here. 'I am a stranger! I can't just go to him like 'Hi you don't really know me but do you want to know about my life story?'' He shook his head and followed the baker to the counter to look at the different bread, taking in the good smell of fresh bread.

After a couple of minutes of looking around he took a dark brown corn mix, smiling at Matthias when he offered him to cut off a piece so he could sit down and try the bread, if he really liked it. Looking around he noticed that most of the customers seemed to do that, almost all chairs in the side of the shop where occupied. The people had cups of tea or coffee standing in front of them, together with a plate of the bread they decided to buy, newspapers or magazines and another plate with differed spreads for the bread.

"Sure, but I bet it's great so trying it will only confirm it." He tilted his head a little to the side and gave him a shy grin. He noticed a faint blush on Matthias cheeks at his compliment and had to blush himself, looking down and rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly.

Still with the blush on his face he went to the tables, taking one from where he had a good view out into the cold darkness. He sighed and rested his chin in his hand, spreading some butter on the piece of bread and trying it. It was still warm and just how he had thought, it was amazing. His eyes fell shut while he enjoyed it, chewing slowly to save the taste on his tongue.

"And is it any good?" His eyes opened and he jolted up a little. Matthias stood beside him with his hand fiddling nervously with his apron. "Ja it's great. Just like I said!" The cheerful smile spread over the baker's face once more and his blue eyes seemed to shine. "Really? Thank you." He pulled the second chair at the table back and sat down opposite to him like this one week ago. "And? How's life going?" 'Now is the chance! Tell him! He offered it to you. Come on!' He swallowed and cleared his throat. "Good. Everything is fine. Just a little stress."

He just couldn't do this. He couldn't tell him that his life was at the edge of breaking down. He didn't want to see that smile vanish from that face. So he stayed quiet and continued eating.

"Well that's good to head, isn't it? If you need anything just call for me, will you?" Somehow he felt as if Matthias didn't only talk about the bread. He looked up to him but the man was already gone back to the counter, talking to a new customer with that cheerful smile. His heart sunk a little. 'He's like this to everybody. I'm just another guest. You misunderstood this, he only meant the bread.' He couldn't tell why that made him so sad or almost angry, but suddenly he was on his legs and walked over to the counter, the plates in his hands. "Thanks, that was good. I'd like to buy the bread now." He couldn't even look into his eyes while paying and leaving, the dogs that had so patiently waited for him at the door jumping around him. His head spun, many different thoughts playing through his mind while he stuffed his hands into his pockets.

"Let's go home, buddies. There's nothing here for us." He didn't notice the blue eyes that followed him while he left, didn't see how that cheerful smile left the face, didn't even notice that the dogs stayed behind while he walked down the street.

But the blue eyes noticed how his posture seemed to change with each step, how his shoulders hung down and his steps got shorter. And they noticed the bag with the bread still lying on the counter, next to a brown wallet.

A slow smile spread on Matthias face while he picked the wallet up and took a look inside, seeing Ludwig's passport and everything important for him. But his eyes only scanned one thing. The address underneath the picture.

Ludwig opened the door to the big and silent house, his hands feeling stiff and cold and he had some troubles getting the key into the keyhole but in the end he succeeded and pushed the door open with a curse. The three dogs immediately ran into the kitchen to drink their bowls empty, spreading the water on the whole kitchen floor and almost making Ludwig give an angry growl. He was tired, hungry and in a bad mood and now he had to clean his floor as well. 'First eat! Then I can cool down!'

Just then did he notice that he hadn't taken the bread with him, a loud and annoyed groan leaving his lips while he let himself fall down on the couch, burying his face in the pillows. He was too tired to go and get the bread now, so he decided to do it tomorrow, rolling around on the couch until he was lying on his back. He stared at the ceiling, going over what happened this day. 'I didn't find a new job, I had an argument with my brother and I made a useless visit to a man I don't know only to forget what I bought.' He sighed loudly and reached into his pocket to get his wallet out and check if he still had enough money in there to order a pizza. He cussed loudly when he found that his pocket was empty. 'And add that I lost my wallet. What a great day!'


	5. Chapter 5

**So I 've found some time to continue this mess xD I still don't own Hetalia (sadly) but I hope you like it. Little cussing~**

He must have fallen asleep because the ringing of the door bell woke him up. He needed some seconds to orientate himself, the light from the living room windows blinding him for a moment and he needed another to remember why he slept on the couch even though there was a warm and cosy bed waiting for him just one floor further up the stairs.

With a groan he lifted his head up from the pillows, his body feeling stiff and cold in the cloths of the last day, the blanket laid neatly folded up at the end of the couch. Slowly he sat up and rubbed his eyes, a headache making its way into his temples. The door rang a second time. "Coming!", he yelled and stood up, stretching his limbs to get a feeling into them before slowly walking to the front door. Well, more like limping.

His stomach gave a protesting growl when he passed the kitchen door without making a short break to get himself some breakfast, but he knew that the cupboards were empty anyways and what did marmalade without bread do except create a mess in his clean kitchen? 'Why did you even forget the bread and your wallet, stupid?'

Finally arriving at the door, he threw a short side gaze into the mirror hanging in his hall, staring at himself. His golden hair hung down into his face and he had deep black circles under his eyelids that stood in a great contrast to his pale face. He rolled his eyes. 'Gotta hope whoever's out there doesn't believe in Zombies..!' With another groan he unlocked the door and opened it, the light blinding him for a second and making him shut his eyes. In his moment of blindness he heard somebody gasp and felt a body press itself past him into the house. When he was finally able to see again, it seemed as if he had no guest for there stood nobody in front of him, but the sounds of amazements that came from his living room told him another story.

With an inner eye rolling, he turned around and made his way back, expecting to see one of his friends. What he didn't expect was a beaming Matthias with a bag on his arm standing in the living room and staring at his huge TV like a small child on Christmas. "Wow.. It's so huge!" "Ja, come in. I am fine, thanks. Would you like something to drink or a guided tour through my house?" He couldn't help it, he just wasn't a morning person and he hated it when people came bursting into his private zone.

"Sorry this is just the biggest TV I have ever seen. Wow... I bet when you watch soccer you can see everything! ...Wait that doesn't make sense..!" The male looked a little lost at the TV screen before grinning at him and shrugging his shoulder. "What I wanted to say was-.. Oh hello you cuties!" The next moment Matthias was on his knees and scratched his dogs' ears, cooing to them like the evening before. And that reminded Ludwig of why he had left the baker's shop so hurriedly and forgot his bread. And wallet.

'It's normal. He comes to everyone's house to bring them their forgotten things. I'm sure of it!' He wanted to make himself believe that, not really sure why.

Ludwig crossed his arms in front of his chest and rolled his eyes, this time visible. "Would you like to explain to me why you invade my house like this in the early morning?" "Early? It's like... 3 o'clock in the afternoon?!"

"What? No, that's not possible. I never sleep that long!" Ludwig grabbed his head and rubbed his hurting temples, looking at the clock that hung over the fireplace. 'It really is 3... Oh Gott..!'

"That's normal, you know? After having lost your job it's normal that you lose a feeling for time. I mean you have nothing to schedule your day after." And there it was, the pity he didn't want. At least not from this guy. "Well if you are here to remind me of the fact that I have lost my job and my life is shit, thank you, but I figured that myself!" "No, no. Sorry. I didn't mean it like that..." The other blond male seemed truly guilty about what he had said, his head hanging down together with his shoulders and his blue eyes looked sadly at him. But still filled with pity. Suddenly his face lit up, as if he had an idea. "But your life can't be shit if you still are able to pay for all this, right?"

When Matthias saw how Ludwig's face got dark and angry, he knew that he had said the worst thing possible. Slowly he got up from the floor, brushing the dust from his clothes. "You... you aren't able to pay for this all... Am I right?"

"Ja you are fucking right, happy now? I can't pay for anything! I'm happy that I still have enough to buy some food for me and the dogs!" The anger whelmed up in him before he could even control it. "And I don't need idiots like you to run around in my house, telling me that I am-.. What do you even want here?" Matthias had taken some steps back from him, looking at his feet. "I... I wanted to bring you your wallet and your bread... you forgot it at my show last evening. I'm sorry I didn't mean to make you angry."

This time it was Ludwig's turn to feel guilty, running a hand through his messy hair. "No, sorry. I didn't mean to yell at you like this. I am just very stressed out and I don't know what to do anymore." A shaky smile formed on his tired face, making him look even more desperate. "Oh.. come, I've got your bread. Let's sit down and eat something. With an empty stomach I can't think!"

Ludwig's arm got grabbed and he was pulled into his own kitchen where a smiling Dane began to cut the bread in pieces and prepare them with marmalade and cheese before sitting down opposite to him on the kitchen table. This all felt like a Deja-Vu from the day before, making him hold his aching head again. The next moment a cup of steaming coffee was set in front of his face, making him look up. "How.." "Well I have the same coffee machine in my shop like you have it in here and you seem pretty tired so I thought I could make you a cup to chill out?"

He nodded, taking a sip while looking out of the window. "So... How did you even find out where I live?" "Ah! I almost forgot to give you your wallet!" Matthias placed the brown thing next to the cup, grinning at him. "Thanks. I guess if I had really lost it.. that would have been it."


End file.
